Last week school began. Both of our girls had an AWESOME first week. Our 6 year old did have one day where she got in trouble for talking too much. In hind-sight I feel really guilty because I laid it on pretty thick that she knows better than to talk during class. In my defense, she talked all through Kindergarten too, so she DOES know she's not supposed to talk during class. With that said, I am trying to be a bit more compassionate with her.
We start therapy tomorrow, and I am hopeful the therapist can assist me in helping her.
My 4 year old had (well I went alone) therapy last week. The therapist recommended "The Connected Child" by Purvis, Cross, and Sunshine. This book is SO wonderful! I couldn't put it down. It was like I had someone holding my hand telling me to do this, and not that.
This book has helped me become way more compassionate and it has changed my approach especially in regards to my 4 year old.
My 6 year old is a more difficult case to crack. Although she is sweet, caring, and ultimately a fantastic kid, some of her tendencies are mind boggling to say the least.
She talks NON-STOP! I mean to the point that I feel like I just need a pair of ear muffs to muffle out the noise. Telling/asking her to stop merely sends her into a crying slumber, so I have come to my wits end. Some days I wish she would just STFU! I try soooo hard not to be impatient, but it is difficult. When my 4 year old is dressed and ready and my 6 year old talks and takes 20 more minutes, I just want to bang my head against the wall.
She is constantly touching things. Our shopping rule is NO TOUCHING! I typically make them wear pocketed pants so they can place their hands in their pockets instead of on things.
My 6 year old literally touched EVERYTHING in the store. After I repeatedly told her to stop. Next time I guess we will just leave mid-trip, because now I know I have to "say what I mean and mean what I say".
UGH!
With all of that said, we are making progress. I plan to do an update this week with the things I am learning in my book. It is helping!
4 comments:
Hi! Shopping was so overwhelming for R too at first- no one had really bothered to take her into stores before.
One of the things that really helped was making sure she knew she was in charge of picking a kind of cookie, a kind of cereal, and a kind of fruit. She also rode in the basket- sometimes even in the big part and I would hand things to her to put in for me. (come to think of it, I think those were ideas I got from The Connected Child- LOVE that book!)
In other stores she held a "list" of things that I "needed": soap, elephants, shoes, trees, etc. She couldnt read so....I made myself laugh anyway. :)
Good Job Mama! You are awesome!
I have done the list, and it worked. I sit my 4 yr old in the cart, but my 6 yr old is the size of a 10-12 yr old. She weighs almost 80lbs! I can't push all of their weight plus the stuff! :)
The first time I took my 4 yr old to Walmart, she asked me who was going to stay in the car with her!! LMAO! I was like, you're coming with me, and she beamed with joy!
I got the book for the kindle app, and started it today. You are soo right.. it really does give you a new perspective into their little minds. Time-outs work well with our 5 yr old, but with the almost 3 yr old.. not so much. She screams and cries and kicks through the whole thing. So tonight I changed the name and the technique with her. It's now her thinking spot and she is told exactly what she needs to "think about" for her 2 minutes. Not one ounce of crying. I think she just really need to know why she is there. ♥
Maddie, the Re-Do's work well too! My girls even have me do a re-do when I mess up! :)
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